It’s Day40 of TITANIUM90 and it’s Mother’s Day all around the world [May 12, 2013]. The past week of training I’ve been taking things a little easy as I was making adjustments as I had to pay attention to details with the work that I have plus I was down with coughs and colds. I do feel better now and hope that I can get back to my regular training program. The following is what I wrote a few weeks earlier…
In a few weeks from now will be mother’s day. The reason I can’t forget this annual event is not because I remember my mother. That’s just the second reason why I remember mothers’ day. I remember this annual event as the day that we buried my father. Six years ago he passed away. Somehow when I think about it right now I feel that six years didn’t feel that long and the old adage that it felt more like it happened just the other day holds true.
I’m on my seventh day of training for TITANIUM90 and I cannot help but feel nostalgic and also a little teary eyed. One, it is hard to train properly especially since I started my training in the middle of summer! The heat of the sun overwhelms me even at the break of dawn. Now add the heat of the pavement and you get the picture of running inside a heated sauna. That’s how I feel on most days. These are just the tips of the iceberg because running around Metro Manila is tougher than it looks. There’s the smell of the sewage even in the best places such as BGC especially in the early mornings when the garbage trucks pass by to collect the day’s waste and the major roads are not friendly either as the air pollution from the previous day comes down in a cloud of dust because of the few degrees of lowered by the hours of darkness before the dawn.
So yeah, whenever I am running and I am not listening to music sometimes my mind just thinks about the past and thinks about the future. But since this post that I am writing is something I hope to publish online on mothers’ day, I want it to be a little more significant than remembering the dead as I still have my mother.
If there’s one thing that my mother still can’t accept and still has difficulty remembering is that she is the biggest influence I’ve had in my passion for running. I remember the first time she gave me my first pair of NIKE running shoes. It was called the NIKE GIZMO. It was the top of the line running shoe at that time and it was specifically marketed for kids to engage in active sports. I remember the it well because the entire upper of the shoe was black and the swoosh was color red while the entire sole was the color of the rainbow with mini spikes similar to that of football and soccer shoes yet it was designed for running.
I was in fourth grade at the time when she gave it to me and I remember very well because suddenly I became one of the IN kids and I was always selected as part of a team to take part in TAG YOUR IT or LANGIT OR IMPYERNO [Translation: Heaven or Hell], and SAKSAK PUSO [Translation: Stab and Heart] . All because of one pair of NIKES. I was never much into running as a kid but something in me just awakened deep within my soul. I felt an immense measure of joy inside of me simply by running fast and catching my breathe. That first pair of running shoes proved to be the first step in my journey towards making running one of my deepest and biggest passions in life. I had a lot of detours along the way as I mentioned in a previous entry — I got addicted to watching television shows which I can hardly remember most of the episodes now if you ask me about them.
I am trying to remember these things because it’s hard to sustain a goal when I start losing track of where I came from and where it all started. It’s difficult to move forward when all I feel right now are sore muscles that scream at my soul and telling me to stop this madness. I try to console myself and say that why is it that after a dozen marathons and a dozen other ultramarathon distances I still feel small? Why is it that I feel that this is another challenge that is beyond me and that I feel that I am wasting all my time into this endeavor?
Beyond the philosophical reasons and my doubts, I am sharing this blog post as a testament that my mother was supportive of my running. When I think more about it, it was the one of the few things that she didn’t even bother to ask questions about.
If you’re a mother reading this – remember that you don’t have to give your child everything that they want. That would only make them feel that the world revolves around them and that they can get away with anything. Disappoint is as much a lesson that children ought to learn in life and learn it young and learn to accept easily. But I am appealing to mothers that you continue to nurture your children’s interest in the best possible way that you can. Encourage them to go out and play with their neighbors or relatives. Let them stumble and fall and let them experience what it is to cry and know that it isn’t the end and that pain is part of life. It might just surprise you that one action that you do would form a lasting impression on your child like what my mother did for me. It was 1987 when I laced up my first pair running shoes at 9 years old. Life was a bumpy ride and still remains a difficult one till now. But I still press on and managed to regain the passion of my youth and now it reminds me that yes, I can still make it happen and I am indeed determined to see this MILO MARATHON 2013 a reality.
Till then, let my running prove the sunshine….